21 June 2012

One Solstice Night, Pt 3

Last couple years on the night of the summer solstice I've stayed up till dawn, blogging my activities. It's already become something of a tradition for me, so no reason to stop now. For company this time I have a bottle of cheap red wine and (once again) some Pringles.

22:51 - Sunset. I begun the evening by playing a couple hours of Skyrim. I recently got back to it after a longish break. It's still fun. But I think I'll go with movies for tonight's main entertainment. I've already had a couple glasses of wine, and feel great. ;-) Just recently Troma Entertainment (known for such classics as Toxic Avenger) released a whole bunch of their old movies for free on YouTube. So what better opportunity to check out a turkey of two?

23:18 - My first movie choice is Wizards of the Demon Sword. Simply based on the cool name. And just ten minutes into it... wow, have I ever seen such a cheesy, cheap production? The costumes, the sets, the writing... words don't suffice... I'm loving it!

23:28 - Let's hear it for gratuitous nudity! (Edit after movie: one topless scene was the extent of it for this movie.)

0:30 - Brewed a cup of coffee. Still a long way to go till dawn, and the wine's affecting me... perhaps a little more than I'd care to admit.

0:54 - Movie's over. And yeah, that was so bad, I loved every minute of it. The 'sword' of the title was apparently just a dagger. And was this really made in 1990? Looked, like, twenty years older, easily... And in case you're wondering, its score at IMDb is a magnificent 1.9!

2:04 - Went for a little walk, something I rarely have the motivation to do at night. Which is a shame, really, since the nights really are the best part of summer – so cool, so quiet, so fragrant. Hardly a soul around. The sky, though, was so light I could hardly see a single star, even in the dead of night. Which is kinda spooky.

2:10 - The actual moment of the solstice, being an 'astronomical event that happens twice each year when the Sun reaches its highest position in the sky as seen from the North or South Pole' (according to Wikipedia).

2:20 - I still have time for another movie, so I'll pick... dramatic drumroll... A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell! The title itself simply boggles the mind.

2:38 - First surprise: it's a post-apocalyptic setting, rather than prehistoric. Second surprise: despite the name, the protagonist isn't blond, nor does she have large breasts. Other than that, as cheesy and cheaply produced as the previous one!

2:47 - Just finished off the wine. Not that a glass more at this point makes a lot of difference. The walk probably sobered me up some, and general tiredness is gradually taking over from tipsiness.

3:50 - Finished the movie. And wow, I hardly expected it to be worse than the previous one. Even less plot, and rather few dinosaur scenes in the end, too. (On the plus side, it wasn't really as sexist as I feared it might be, based on the title.) IMDb rating equals the first one, at 1.9!

3:55 - Sunrise! And I'm off to bed. Goodnight, world.

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